It is time, as we near the close of this year, to reflect a bit on what has gone before. It is time also to look forward and set intentions for the year to come. Time to get off of this safe rock midstream and venture onward. What lies beyond the bend?

Much has transpired since I stepped on that fateful rock that upended, dumping me into the deep, cold, swift waters of grief. There have been times when I felt devastated, alone, even forgotten, swept along by the current and ricocheting off of the rocks.

And there have been more times when I found a place to breathe, to rest, as someone stretched out a hand in aide. I have old friends with whom my relationship has deepened. I have new friends who brought messages of love and healing. All of these friends, and these experiences, are precious to me.

I myself have changed: I have consciously moved from the mindset of a victim of tragedy to that of a survivor, and I am reaching beyond, and beginning to thrive. I’ve adorned my body with one tattoo, and I have another one planned. I have grown closer to Spirit, and grown in my understanding of my Oneness with The Universe. I sing again. I play my ukulele. And I appear to have found my voice as a writer, or at least as a blogger! I’ve even learned how to make some pretty awesome apple butter!

It still boggles my mind how I have managed to come so far in so little time. Faith has been with me every step of the way; sometimes I have been aware of her presence, more often not. But her voice has continuously spoken from the back of my head, there whenever I asked “what would Faith have done?” She would not allow me to sit still, to linger in my darkest moments. Always she would push me forward, putting words in front of me that I needed to read, bringing people into my life with messages I needed to receive. The dark, the sadness would come, but it was always followed by light, and it was my trust in this cycle that gave me wings to fly. It was faith – my Faith – who brought back the joy.  

Turning my eyes to the coming year, I see Light. I see Hope. I see a continuation of my journey, stepping from one rock to another. But for now the rocks seem to be closer together, more stable and not so slippery. I may still slip or stumble on occasion, I may even get wet, especially if I focus my attention too much on the past or the future and forget to pay attention to where I’m putting my feet. Even so, I know that when this happens there will be another stable rock nearby where I can pull myself out of the water and dry off, basking in the light and warmth of the sun.

In the coming year I hope to speak less of my grief and more of my growth. I will cry, but I will also laugh. I will sing, I will continue my journey downstream in gratitude and wonder.

For now, though, I am content in the present moment. And I am grateful.

I am grateful for the roof over my head. I am grateful for my friends and family. I am grateful for the joy in my heart that sustains me even through the darkest nights. I am grateful for the light that comes in the morning. I am even grateful for my silly dog who makes me laugh!

And I am grateful for you, my readers, my friends, for following my rambling journey down this stream of life.

As the old year fades and the new year begins, I wish for each and every one of you blessings of peace, love, joy and laughter. May your year to come be filled with magic and wonder!